Share our love of handbags, books, and all things gossip...okay, and Twilight too.

We're two delightfully crass gals who spend an inordinate amount of time texting and e-mailing one another throughout the day. We've decided to expound on some of our best work. Please to enjoy.

TwiShame: The Kindle Edition

Every Sunday while doing my grocery shopping at my local WalMart I pass by the book section and peruse the best sellers. I started seeing these simple black book covers a couple of years ago and was intrigued, but for some reason I never dared to pick one up. Something told me that it just wasn’t right. Hindsight is 20/20. Anyway, last fall I noticed my niece’s room plastered with pictures of the aforementioned “actor who had the crazy unwashed nast hair.”

Yes, I am not proud of myself, but I ridiculed the suddenly emo pre-teen. Of course, I never totally had anything Christian Slater taped on my walls at her age. I started wondering about the appropriateness of these books for my niece. Certainly these were too adult for her...I was concerned for her soul. Around the same time, I decided that I should get a Kindle. The reason I told everyone I wanted to get one was because I was traveling all the time and carrying around 2-3 books sucked; I really wanted the Kindle so I could read books that I was too embarrassed to read with the cover showing. I had an unfortunate experience a couple of years ago on a plane while reading Jennifer Weiner’s book Good In Bed (great read btw). Nuff said. Anyway, I thought, now is my time to read this Twilight book, to make sure it’s age appropriate for my niece of course. So I saved my Christmas money and my birthday money and finally got a Kindle. It arrived on my doorstep the next day, I shipped it overnight of course. I unwrapped it, caressed it, and then had to charge it before its first use. Bah, must have instant gratification! Of course, you all know what happened next. Waiting with baited breath, I downloaded my first e-book…Why We Suck…hehe seriously, by Denis Leary, it was hilarious. Still a little wary, I waited to download my secret yearning…it seemed so wrong. But I had to do it…for my niece. And then I threw caution to the wind and downloaded Twilight. I read all of the books and Midnight Sun in a week. It was crazy. You all know how it takes over your life. I barely slept. I read the books on my iPhone during meetings. (Yeah, I'm gadgety okay?) Somehow I felt like I had cheated my book reading shame. I even admitted to my niece that I was reading the books (which she totally almost ruined for me!). I was joyful…giddy even just thinking about the world of questionable reading material that was now open to me. And then one night on a crowded plane it happened…I heard a guy behind me whisper, “hey, isn’t that a Kindle?” OMG, people were going to want to see it. What was I going to do? Panic stricken, my first thought was to jam it back in my bag and hide it. Thankfully, I was saved by the bell (the plane began its descent), and I had to turn it off and put it away.

But I wondered to myself, what if I wasn’t as lucky next time? How could I not share my experience with others? Was I so selfish? Clearly not, I thought. This device had opened up so much to me. I just had to share it. Since then, I have had to expose my reading shame to hundreds of strangers. Oh, and how the shame has expanded. As B stated in an earlier post, she had to have more adult content…well, I have plenty of that on my Kindle now…definitely not suitable for my niece. Somehow I have kept my chin up…read: I downloaded a classic, Jane Eyre no less, to use as my demo book, hehe. I always look shocked at my recommendations when I show people the Kindle store…Southern Vampire Mysteries…WTF? I don’t know how that got on there…must be a glitch…sorry Amazon (go Team Eric!). So now my secret is out…the girl blushing and fanning herself while sitting next to you on the airplane reading her Kindle definitely is not reading Jane Eyre.

3 comments:

Jenny Jerkface said...

LOL! I love the Christian Slater reference. Oh, how I loved him...

I've been tempted by the kindle but I think I might get a laptop instead.

And honestly, I think it's kind of funny when people walk around with 'Best Women's Erotica' anthologies tucked in their bags...

I've only read one Sookie Stackhouse book but I think I might give it another go...

Fire Crotch said...

Love the Sookie books...totally became a fan girl. Books 4 and 9 are my faves. But the book that really got me going was Outlander...it's super long, but it's got some good stuff in it. One review on Amazon said it was, "sex, sex, sex, rape, sex, sex, and more sex"...totally made me buy it. Hehe.

cuteangiek said...

What a great Twi-Story! I LOVE IT!!!!:)

This Kindle sounds amazing. Being a stay at home mom, however, I am not sure I could justify it at the moment. And I do keep all my "dirty" books hidden. shh... I'm a closet case romance novel reader! For shame I KNOW. But I keep them all hidden, with my smarty pants books in view for the world to see. And Twilight, of course. :)

GREAT POST!

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