Share our love of handbags, books, and all things gossip...okay, and Twilight too.

We're two delightfully crass gals who spend an inordinate amount of time texting and e-mailing one another throughout the day. We've decided to expound on some of our best work. Please to enjoy.

Let Google Search Help You!

After a long bloggy absence (okay it's only been since Saturday), I come back today stronger than ever. Okay not really. I just totally ripped off the idea from here because I have a lot of work to do and don't have the time or energy to be original. Sorry peeps.

So you know how when you type stuff in the Google Search and it prompts you with possible queries? If not, go to Google and try it, after you read this blog of course fool! Here are some mighty interesting searches for sure.

I understand all of the doomsday stuff, but check that out...we twi-hards must have our Twilight DVDs! It's certainly more important than finding out when the recession will end but slightly less important than finding out when you will get your tax refund. Here's why: lots of peeps needed the refund to go and purchase said Twilight DVD.

People want to know where the vice president lives only slightly more than they want to know where Robert Pattinson lives. Hmmm...very interesting. I can't understand the Miley Cyrus inquiry, perhaps it's all of the middle-aged stalkers she has.

TMI alert! I have googled "why is my poop green." You'll have to google to find out why it turned green. And now I totally need to understand "why is a raven like a writing desk." Sounds like some crazy-ass English assignment that the kid was hoping to copy from the interwebs.

"How does Twitter work?" Not very well the for the past week. And I would also like to know how David Blaine levitates...he is the spawn of Satan...seriously, he is creepy. Maybe if he dated Cameron Diaz it would bring his creepiness level down to defcon 3.

You seriously don't know what "if you seek Amy" means? Still? Even after the Britney song? You probably are the same person who doesn't understand what "sofa king awesome" means either. Here's a hint...just say it fast...and if you still don't get it, then it's probably something you don't do very often.

"She's more important than the antichrist and Lady Gaga..."
"What is, who is Robert Pattinson dating?"
Ding, ding, ding! "You are correct. Make your next selection."
"Thanks Alex, I'll take crazy Google searches for $400."

Thanks for joining the studio audience. Here's a lovely parting gift for you.


Annie said...

LOL!!! That is amazement. I'm going to do this right now and might just blog about the results, too (avec credit pour toi, bien sur). Good to know we Twi-hards are taking over. :p

Bitches said...

Don't castrate me, but I have to say I'm not a big fan of that Jackson Rathbone pic...kinda skeers me. Just a bit.
Ok, I still want to know "can jesus microwave a burrito?"

KG said...

LMAO!! I am still laughing at the conversation i just had with my husband after reading this post to him...I am the same person who doesn't know (didn't know) what "sofa king awesome" meant! LOL i tried to trick my husband:
KG "hey say sofa king awesome real fast"
Dano "no, i already know that one"
KG "you knew that?!"
Dano "you didnt?"
KG "no, i've been reading it online for 4 months, and never said it outloud"
Dano "OH MY GOSH!! BWAHAHHAHA you are sooo funny! i can't believe you"
KG "what does 'if you seek Amy' mean?"
Dano *unintelligible gibberish*
KG "say what?"
Dano "whaa whaa whaa waah"
KG "I don't get it"
Dano "you are unbelievable."

needless to say I still don't get the Amy thing.

Snarkier Than You said...

That's hysterical! And now I need to know so may things... I am always amazed (and frequently disturbed) by some of the stuff that comes up in google search. But also compelled to follow weird links sometimes, too! Can you blame me?

I'm off to uncover the mysteries of green poop!

: )

Fire Crotch said...

@Bitches - Seriously, you're going to get on me for the pic? I kinda thought I had all my bases covered...and for the record, you don't need to like Jackson...just leaves more for me! And I wanna know if gorillas can swim. So there!

Mrs. Vanquish said...

What would we do without google!!! And I admit I don´t get neither the Army nor the Sofa thing. But that might be due to my lack of english? I hope...

jrieggs said...

Wow, that's pretty awesome. You could waste days doing those searches! Apparently people aren't paying attention in middle school when they teach why the sky is blue...come on people!

oh, and ladies sound it out with me...all the boys and all the girls are begging to if (eff) you (u) seek (c) amy (kme) pretty clever for a brittney song!

Mrs. Vanquish said...

uhh Thanks jrieggs! and thanks to FC - now I know what you are talking about and, now that I know it was really obvious....

Anonymous said...

This was full of funny!

I love that autosearch crap. It always leads to more questions than you started out with!
Think about it, STY is learning about green poop right now. YOU did that. Don't you feel special?

The autosearch thing can be problematic with someone like me, who has 'tard fingers and can't type for shizz.
It usually leads me to morally gray areas and internet porn....
I am talking about RobPorn...
Yeah, okay I was talking about real porn.

Post a Comment