Share our love of handbags, books, and all things gossip...okay, and Twilight too.

We're two delightfully crass gals who spend an inordinate amount of time texting and e-mailing one another throughout the day. We've decided to expound on some of our best work. Please to enjoy.

Pimpin' Part 2

For those of you who missed Part 1 of my fanfic author interview, 1. I'm hurt because you obviously haven't been obsessively reading the blog, and 2. you can check it out here. I think you'll enjoy the rest of the interview, and if not...who cares, I enjoyed it, and that's enough for me. Hehe.

The Volturi children are a really interesting set of characters. Where did you get the idea? Can you explain them a bit for those who may not have read your fic yet?

My half-bloods started with Ivy (thus my pen name). When I read the series, I wondered to myself: what if Bella showed the balls she hinted upon in Twilight and told Edward to piss off; remaining with Jacob? Edward would, from the series, just wither away, ceasing to be our sexy beast. But what if there was someone else, someone who was human still like they desire, yet struggling with vampire issues of their own? Ivy was my “perfect pair” for Edward, however I wrote this fic to please a friend, and I was pretty sure she would not like me “giving Edward away” to another girl, so to speak. So therefore, it is Edward/Bella, and I do not intend for Ivy or Mik to interfere with their “happy ending.” I did toy with the idea of Mikhail liking Bella, but I didn’t want to give my readers heart attacks. So that idea stayed up in the air. Ivy is the ideal me and Mikhail is my freaking dreamboat (a tattooed M. Ventimiglia ~ shudders in delight ~)

For anyone who has not read “A Twisted Twilight Tale” my “half-bloods” are five half human children, half Volturi blood, making them royal in the eyes of Vampires. It pulled a bit from Breaking Dawn, because I felt that the Volturi should know that half-vampires would be possible, they have been around for eons. And what better than to have vampires with human traits, so they can blend into society? So some Volturi experimentation began with a few human women. Two passed away in childbirth (Joy’s and Maxwell’s), Mikhail’s was turned, and Lizabeth (Ivy/Spike’s mom) is still human as can be. I thought giving hard and evil Caius a human wife was poetic irony. Thus there are five half-vampires, two Caius’s (Ivy and Spencer), two Marcus’s (Mikhail and Maxwell) and one that is Aro’s (Joy).

“Excuse Me”, Spike intercedes, leaning over my chair to peruse my answer, “Why are you telling her about us? Shouldn’t we be doing that?” his spiked hair tickles my cheek as he laughs brusquely at my response about his family.

“Spike, go torture your sister. I’m writing an interview! FireCr0tch didn’t ask you to talk to her, bastard!”

Spike: My sister asked me to stop by, since you have stolen her identity, in a first name perspective. The Volturi Half-Bloods asked me to drop by, and give the true 411, per say. ~ grabs keyboard ~ evil bastard!

Spike : Hello lovelies. The name is Spencer, but you can call me Spike, kay? Miss Lane is trying to whip the computer out of my hand, but she seems to forget that I am quite fast, and much stronger than her frail and soft little hands could be. She won’t get this back until I am done.

Ivy! Stop hitting me with that ruler or I’ll show you a much more satisfying way to use it, lover. If you didn’t have the same name as my sister...

And wait until I tell my father about your poetic irony, he may clamp you in irons! Don’t tell these strangers how much he idolizes my gorgeous and angelic mother; he detests weakness on any level and it quite unmans him.

Anyway, my sister and I are the youngest of the group of half-bloods, just turned 16 this year. The trouble with being half-human is we are still aging, weird that. But I still can’t grow a fucking beard; so my aging may be slowing down some. Maxwell stopped aging at 15, so he looks like a baby, if you ask me. Girlies love the little snip though; must be the baby face he’s got going for him.

Mikhail is his older brother; the oldest of us all. As you have read, he is my sister’s stalker/lover. He’s cool, a real artist with Ink. That kid has some smoking hot ideas! But he is like a dog with a fucking bone about my sister, which makes her freaking insane! Miss “I-get-who-I-want-when-I want-them” Ivy Voltaire doesn’t do the commitment thing so well, not that I blame her. Commitments are for the birds, unless you and your lover are truly compatible. She loves the bastard, but she also loves a couple other poor-bastards who I will keep to myself. She is my sister, after all. Can’t air the dirty laundry, can we?

But I dissemble sweetlings.

We are new and improved to an extent; however there is no guarantee of anything for us. Mik can’t heal for shit; Ivy, Joy and I don’t even like the smell of blood, let alone drink that muck; Joy is a slut...

Spencer Voltaire! Give me that laptop and stop talking shit about Joy! A slut indeed! Just because the poor girl doesn’t fall over your feet drooling, you have to talk shit! Sorry about that FireCr0tch. My characters are awfully feisty at times! Anyway back to my characters.

Spike: Don't test me lover! You know what I can do to you if you piss me off. Think of your readers...

“Oh, Hush Spike! Go find your friend Mikhail to torture, please. And tell him to come keep me company later.”

Silly vampire! Sorry about that. You will not meet Maxwell or Joy yet. Please don’t listen to Spike about her, she is not a slut! She won’t give him any so he is a bitter, heartbroken vampire. Anyway, I don’t need Max or Joy for this story, so they stay in Italy where they belong for now.

Spike (Spencer) and Ivy are twins, and their mother is the only one to live (without being turned) afterwards. Ivy’s gift, which is healing, was a major part of why their mother survived the ordeal, but I didn’t actually come out and say that during this tale, I don’t think. My main thinking was since there were two of them: their strength was split in half, making her carrying them and delivering them much easier. Wait until you find out Spike’s gift, you are going to be scratching your heads asking questions... Since the stubborn bastard stole my email, I should tell you to spite his evil ass. I know you are thinking. What can he do???


I like to leave their looks to your imagination, but I did have people I kind of mirrored a couple of them after: My Mikhail resembles Milo V. from the Fergie Video, Big Girls Don’t cry. Spike is a younger version of Spike from the Buffy and The Vampire Slayer series, but his hair is blonde with whitish tips. Maxwell looks like Norman Reedus. The girls are open for interpretation (sorry I fixated on the guys too much). All the half-bloods have green eyes, and all have unique tattoos. They glow when the vampire takes over in them. The only tattoo all five have is the Volturi Crest on their back right shoulder blade. They are all sexually mischievous creatures. I love each of them, so I do get a bit upset when people don’t like them, since I love them so.

Is there going to be an off-shoot story for the Volturi kids?

I have a couple story outlines put together, I mentioned them above. Yes my characters will be in them, at least a couple of them at a time. All five will be in The Volturi Affair, which is going to be about Edward’s time living in Italy (pre-Bella). I am hesitant to write it, because I already have several readers who are adamant they only like Edward/Bella stuff. But you know me, if one person likes it, I will write it.

Ivy and Edward seem to have a special relationship, but he doesn't seem to be susceptible to her "charms." Is it because he really only has eyes for Bella or is he just faking it?

I really want to tell you... but I can’t. I think you are going to have to keep reading, because I want to torture you all with it for a bit. All I can say is he only wants Bella, and Ivy doesn’t want Edward. And I can honestly say he is not faking anything!

Please don't hate ivy. She has her own reasons for being a devious little thing. Crap I think I hear Spike coming back...

Oh Spike, go away!

Spike: Dear God! That is all you are going to tell them! HA! You call me evil!

We all have our roles to play Spike.

Spike: HA! Well I have read your chapters and I think it is all as obvious as the nose on your face!

GASP! Did he really just make fun of my nose? What an ass! And he would think it is obvious because he knows the story.

Is Bella going to open a can of whoop-ass on Edward at some point?

Bella is much more independent and has a can of whoop-ass ready to pop open; she just hasn’t had a clear enough mind to use it yet. But she did just get branded; I would be ready to spit nails, wouldn’t you? So once she gets her wits back, which WON’T be in chapter 25 btw... expect some fireworks.

Any other tid-bits that you'd like to share?

My story can be confusing at times; I try to add suspense and build doubt/excitement. I try to comment on as many of my reviewers as possible, but sometimes I just can’t tell you what my intentions are. It would ruin the surprise! I try to add little sneak peaks and extras on my blog; so peek at that if you can. Also, I check my Twitter every day, so if there is something you really want to see or know about, it is the quickest way to get my attention. I post little rants on there too, they can be funny.

I’ll add a small detail that I have not previously mentioned in ATTT. Edward was the tattoo artist who did Ivy and Spike’s tattoos, but he also did one for Mikhail. If you go back through the story, you’ll see the tattoo I refer too, not the wedding band one either. I thought perhaps the readers would put two and two together when they realized that Edward has seen Ivy in the “altogether” so he would know how to depict her accurately in Mik’s tat. Did anyone catch that small innuendo I added in that chapter by any chance?

I have to throw a quick shout out to my absolutely favorite Fan Fiction author! DurtyNelly, I LOVE YOUR WORK!!! I am so obsessed with Masen I almost wish he were real; even though my Masen would look like sexy old RPatz, and I know your does not. I don’t care, your writing is incredible and I hope you have an update soon! My Edward, who is a difficult fucker, could never take on Masen (Masen would eat him for breakfast)! For anyone who has not read Buried Among the Begonias, please do yourself a favor and check it out! She also has another story called I Love You Like Sid and Nancy, also very good writing.

Make sure to check out Ivy's fic and show her some comment love! She posted a great teaser in the comments yesterday for chapter 26 which she posted today (and she said it wasn't recommended to read at work...yeah, well I laugh in the face of warnings and read it anyway...good thing I had a change of panties in my laptop bag)! And follow her on Twitter...she sometimes tweets teasers too!


Amber said...


Bitches said...

My curiosity is piqued...I must add this to my queue.

Call of Duty Widow said...

I'm gonna have to check this out. I'll add it to my list too, just like Bitches.

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