Share our love of handbags, books, and all things gossip...okay, and Twilight too.

We're two delightfully crass gals who spend an inordinate amount of time texting and e-mailing one another throughout the day. We've decided to expound on some of our best work. Please to enjoy.

Let's Play Dress-Up

You know you wanted one when you were younger...well, okay, maybe it was only me. I totally wanted a Samantha American Girl doll. Every November when the giant catalog came to the house I picked Samantha and all of the accessories that I felt were necessary. Of course she needed her steamer trunk and the bed, plus her ice skating outfit, oh and her horses. Well, Mommy FC, er, Santa Claus, never came through with the American Girl Doll or an EZ Bake Oven, but nothing was too good for my niece. She has 3 or 4 American Girl dolls (which she no longer plays with, I might add). But before her wonder wore off, I ended up on AG's email list. And guess what? They have Halloween outfits for your doll. Alas, no vampire outfits, but I was able to find this little ditty.


Cute,huh? At first I thought she was a nice little Pilgrim girl, but with a few additions, voilà! Vampire! I know, I know...my Photoshop skills are pretty awesome. I was going to try my hand at making a Cabbage Patch Kid into a vampire, but I didn't want to blow any minds. And take this as a warning...do NOT google vampire dolls. If you thought
bad unicorns were scary, then consider yourself forewarned.



Those vampire babies really freak me out. Most of them look like hot tranny messes. But believe me, these are pretty mild. Continue at your own risk!

12 comments:

donnersun said...

That is hella creepy.

I saw the weird Robward wig in Target the other day. I almost bought it, but decided that I really couldn't face that kind of embarrassment at the register (yet. Give me a few months and I may be there).

Danny said...

omg that´s really disgusting! Which small kid would like to play with it??
I would have had nightmares...

kt said...

haha i dont know how many christmases i asked for a samantha doll and all her accessories. never got one. my younger (by 6 years) cousin had one however. and one of the ones that are made to look like your twin. and she had TONS of accessories. at 12 i was disgustingly jealous of a 6 year old. it still irks me sometimes. apparently i hold grudges. haha.

word verification: piticat. the lolcat laughing at me for being pitiful and jealous of my kindergarten aged cousin when i was in 7th grade.

Angela Lynn said...

Oh American Girls... You know? I was to low brow to know about them when I was a little girl. I had cabbage patch kids and Barbies. I did have a whole set of Rainbow Brite dolls... oh the wonderment!

Honolulu Girl-Suz said...

I was always afraid of dolls should they come alive. So I always surrounded myself with teddy bears because they seemed less like to bite me if they came alive. I had an active imagination as a kid.

Unknown said...

Hmmm, I wonder if CFC was really trying to make a vampire barbie when she cut and painted it's hair with mascara?

I could have done wonderfully awful things to an American Girl doll. Thank gawd my Momma Piranha only saw fit to buy me the horses from She-Ra and Rainbow Brite.

And My Little Ponies, of course. Woot woot!

Alice said...

The atmost right one looks like Megan Fox. That says a lot!

donnersun said...

@RSM: "Thank gawd my Momma Piranha only saw fit to buy me the horses from She-Ra and Rainbow Brite." LOL Me too! I'm pretty sure I never owned a Barbie growing up, yet I recently considered (for a hot minute) purchasing the weirdo Edward Barbie. What I really need is the weirdo Edward Barbie on a horse. Epic win!!!!

Amcas (Ang) said...

How is it that you always find the most creeptastic and slightly horrific pics of what are "traditionally nice items"?

Dolls, unicorns?

You fascinate me.

Can I study you?

Tina Quick said...

OK, I did it, I googled vampire dolls....and all I can say is WTF? Pretty sure those creepy little fuckers are going to trump the hot guy I've been dreaming about for the past 2 weeks.

Bitches said...

I was all about me some American Girl when I was a kidlet. My favorite was Samantha and I read all the books. *sigh* I never even bothered asking for a doll, though. I knew what the answer would be.
Damn. Where on earth do you come up with these heinous pics?! I'm very disturbed.

jrieggs said...

Umm, those little kid vampire dolls are terrifying! Oh, and I never got the American Girl Dolls either. Pretty sure I begged for them but my parents somehow thought stuffed dragons and dinosaurs were better suited for me....it's all starting to come together...

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